Stolen from (her stuff rawks, go check it out) and she's stolen it from some1 else--I have no clue who it really originated from, so apologies.

1.- If I were a fruit I'd be... Queen of the fruits.

2.- If I were a colour I'd be... so hot fluorescent yellow you can't stand to look at me for too long. People would make caution signs out of me.

3.- If I were an animal I'd be... A platypus-->an upset to the natural order of things. I throw mother nature for a loop.

4.- If I were a domestic appliance I'd be... one of those plungers with the ridged handles that you know housewives get off on.

5.- If I were a book I'd be...the Oxford English Dictionary so you could use me for self defense. If you could pick me up, that is.

6.- If I were a clothing item I'd be...a bra so I can be next to your tits all the time. Hmm... or boxers. Keep your balls from getting too sweaty or confined.

7.- If I were a jewel I'd be...so rare I'm unsellable. People just have to effin inherit me when someone dies.

8.- If I were an object I'd be...something that vibrates. Rumblepack FTW!

9.- If I were a car I'd be...in need of a paint job.

10.- If I were an element I'd be... water. Lubricates and is hard to grasp or pin down. Has no definite shape.

11.- If I were a tree I'd be...split by lightning.

12.- If I were an ice cream flavour I'd be... rocky road.

13.- If I were a drink I'd be...a red beer.

14.- If I were a person I'd be...I'm not a person? Now that's just cruel.

15.- If I were a planet I'd be...in you solar system baby.

16.- If I were an insect I'd be...one that eats their young.

17.- If I were public transport I'd be...the blueline in my city--it uses the leftover cars that Japan phased out in the 70's and resold to a dumb American market.

18.- If I were a song I'd be...one that everyone loves to sing in the car, in the shower, on a mountain, wherever.

19.- If I were a movie I'd be...Rated NC-17 for graphic nudity, graphic humor, strong sexual situations, rude language and drinking. w00t!

20.- If I were a season I'd be...summer so everyone would take their clothes off for me.

21.- If I were a flower I'd be...a rose so everyone would think about vaginas when they look at me.

22.- If I were a job I'd be...one you'd loose in about 4 months.

23.- If I were a cartoon I'd be...Jessica Rabbit. No I take it back, she has sex with rabbits. Annoying rabbits.

24.- If I were a place I'd be...someplace moist.

25.- If I were a gift I'd be...one that sets the alarm off if you try to take it through airport security.

26.- If I were a memory I'd be...long term.

27.- If I were a city I'd be...one that causes cancer in babies and people between the ages of 7 and 94

28.- If I were a sense I'd be...common sense. People can always use more of that.

29.- If I were a game I'd be...The Game of Life--two lesbians in a car wondering why they have to have children.

30.- If I were a candy I'd be...a jawbreaker. >3<

31.- If I were a time of the day I'd be...2 in the morning. Cause that's when I get all my best work done, and all the cool people are awake.

32.- If I were an invention I'd be...great on paper, not as functional in real life and my parts aren't easy to source out replacements for when they break.

33.- If I were a body part I'd be...the tounge. You guess why.

34.- If I were a country I'd be...tiny, rich, and old, with a language that almost nobody speaks anymore.

35.- If I were a flavour I'd be...purple.

36.- If I were a sport I'd be...swimming. Wet guys and girls in tight outfits performing with gymnastic-like desterity. What's not to like?

37.- If I were a smell I'd be...one that makes you homesick/heartsick for something you just can't place.

38.- If I were a subject I'd be...biology. The study of life...did I mention it includes anatomy?

39.- If I were a flag I'd be...one that's tattered and sun-bleached, whipping about in a breeze and making "snap!" noises

40.- If I were a building I'd be...a tall one with many floors, confusing layout, no floorplan and a broken elevator.

41.- If I were a month I'd be...October, so I can see people dress up, eat too much candy and dress/act like trollips for me.

42.- If I were a perfume I'd be...a light fragrance that you sniff at the nape of your lover's neck and that clings to the pillows and sheets long after I'm gone to make you wish I was there.

43.- If I were a gummy candy I'd be...something sour with sugar all over the outside that makes it crunchy. All the highschool kids would like me best out of all the gummy candies.

45.- If I were a toy I'd be...one you choke on if you're underage.

46.- If I were a textile I'd be...tightly woven.

47.- If I were a shape I'd be...cubooctahedron.

48.- If I were a answer I'd be...enigmatical.

49.- If I were a common liquorice I'd be...? Eh? There's uncommon liquorice?

50.- If I were a word I'd be...easy to roll out on the tounge and fun to say.